{"id":11286,"date":"2024-09-05T18:44:06","date_gmt":"2024-09-05T15:44:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/?p=11286"},"modified":"2024-09-10T08:34:46","modified_gmt":"2024-09-10T05:34:46","slug":"chiorpangiu","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/?p=11286","title":{"rendered":"Chiorpangiu"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Pleiada de personaje din Chiorpangiu<\/em> \u00ee\u0219i duce via\u021ba \u00een peisajul cu totul aparte al Br\u0103ilei, dar, prin firescul lor, pove\u0219tile dep\u0103nate de narator au un caracter universal. A\u0219a cum copilul Florin este fascinat de atelierul \u00een care bunicul s\u0103u pare s\u0103 fac\u0103 minuni, cu to\u021bii p\u0103str\u0103m \u00een amintire un loc magic din copil\u0103rie. Pentru mai toat\u0103 lumea perioada comunismului a fost foarte dificil\u0103, unii au trecut prin experien\u021be dramatice, dar \u00eentotdeauna oamenii au g\u0103sit puterea s\u0103 reziste sau, a\u0219a cum a f\u0103cut unchiul F\u0103nic\u0103 atunci c\u00e2nd i-a scris Elenei Ceau\u0219escu, au \u00eencercat s\u0103 cear\u0103 ajutor de la c\u00e2rmuire. Fiecare familie are un \u201especialist\u201d \u00een medicin\u0103 care d\u0103 mereu sfaturi sau, la fel ca Aurel dup\u0103 ce bea un pahar, se av\u00e2nt\u0103 s\u0103 efectueze proceduri medicale f\u0103r\u0103 vreo preg\u0103tire \u00een domeniu. De obicei, pe mame le \u00eentrebi c\u00e2nd nu g\u0103se\u0219ti ceva prin cas\u0103, \u00eens\u0103 sunt \u0219i mame experte \u00een a \u201epune bine\u201d lucrurile, a\u0219a ca Tan\u021ba. Nimeni nu are p\u0103rin\u021bi perfec\u021bi, dar to\u021bi vrem s\u0103 \u0219tim c\u0103 le este bine. Fiecare a avut un prieten apropiat de care, dintr-un motiv mai mult sau mai pu\u021bin dureros, s-a \u00eendep\u0103rtat \u00een timp. Adultul de ast\u0103zi le prive\u0219te pe toate f\u0103r\u0103 repro\u0219, cu umor \u0219i nostalgie, \u0219i le \u00eemp\u0103rt\u0103\u0219e\u0219te bucuros cu noi.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Fragment<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

P\u0103rea c\u0103 jum\u0103tate din Br\u0103ila se \u00eenghesuise pe Orientului, str\u0103du\u0163a \u00eengust\u0103 \u015fi pietruit\u0103 unde \u00ee\u015fi avea sediul Poli\u0163ia Circula\u0163iei. \u015ei fiecare candidat avea doi\u2011trei chibi\u0163i care mai degrab\u0103 \u00eei \u0163ineau ghin\u0103 dec\u00e2t \u00eel \u00eencurajau. To\u0163i vreau s\u0103 se termine c\u00e2t mai repede, dar sala micu\u0163\u0103 \u015fi \u00eentunecoas\u0103 \u00een care se \u0163inea examinarea nu f\u0103cea fa\u0163\u0103 puhoiului de candida\u0163i, a\u015fa c\u0103 se organizaser\u0103 mai multe serii de examinare.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Corectarea testelor se f\u0103cea imediat cu un \u015fablon de plastic, dup\u0103 care un poli\u0163ist cu un z\u00e2mbet ce nu anun\u0163a nimic bun ie\u015fea pe podiumul celor c\u00e2teva trepte cu balustrad\u0103 de la intrare, a\u015ftepta ca \u00eenghesui\u0163ii s\u0103 fac\u0103 lini\u015fte \u015fi, flutur\u00e2nd testele, \u00eencepea s\u0103 anun\u0163e rezultatele \u00een gura mare.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nu se \u015ftia atunci nimic despre protec\u0163ia datelor \u015fi confiden\u0163ialitate, a\u015fa c\u0103 \u0103sta era momentul cel mai a\u015fteptat de poli\u0163i\u015ftii agasa\u0163i de nebunia zilei de examen, de prietenii \u015fi \u00eenso\u0163itorii candida\u0163ilor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00cen ziua \u00een care am dat noi examen, portavocea rezultatelor la sal\u0103 era Frumuz, un poli\u0163ist foarte sever \u015fi cu o voce de actor mare.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Frumuz nu se gr\u0103bea \u015fi savura momentul arunc\u00e2nd cu punctaje incredibil de mici. Candida\u0163ii \u00eenc\u0103 nu erau obi\u015fnui\u0163i cu variantele multiple de r\u0103spuns ori pur \u015fi simplu, \u00een marea pestri\u0163\u0103 de candida\u0163i, dintre care mul\u0163i reprograma\u0163i, nu\u2011\u015fi f\u0103cuser\u0103 loc prea mul\u0163i de\u015ftep\u0163i.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Prima serie a fost masacrat\u0103. Frumuz radia:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Ia, hai s\u0103 v\u0103 v\u0103d!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lumea se bulucea \u015fi Frumuz striga numele de pe formulare. Niciodat\u0103 nu striga numele \u015fi punctajul. A\u015ftepta foarte r\u0103bd\u0103tor ca persoana care\u2011\u015fi auzise numele s\u0103 \u00ee\u015fi tr\u0103deze pozi\u0163ia \u00een mul\u0163ime rostind timid: \u201eDa\u201c, \u201eAici\u201c sau \u201ePrezent\u201c, dup\u0103 care pronun\u0163a sentin\u0163a: \u201eCinci puncte!\u201c.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u015etafeta umilin\u0163ei era preluat\u0103 imediat de binevoitorii din mul\u0163ime \u015fi de alaiul candidatului \u00eenvins. Unii se mirau: \u201eDar parc\u0103 ziceai c\u0103 ai \u00eenv\u0103\u0163at!\u201c, \u201eZiceai c\u0103 ai f\u0103cut bine!\u201c, al\u0163ii mureau de r\u00e2s, to\u0163i se bucurau de r\u0103ul altuia. Tot veninul Br\u0103ilei se str\u00e2nsese pe Orientului.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Candida\u0163ii ru\u015fina\u0163i plecau invent\u00e2nd scuze \u00een vreme ce Frumuz continua s\u0103 ghilotineze candida\u0163ii:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Cutare…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Aici!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Opt puncte!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Ionescu…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Prezent!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Trei puncte!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Nu v\u0103 sup\u0103ra\u0163i, unde m\u0103 programez pentru reexaminare?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Dumitale de reexaminare \u00ee\u0163i arde? Dac\u0103 aveai a\u015fa, 19\u201120 de puncte, mai ziceam, da\u2019 la punctajul \u0103sta… mai bine \u00ee\u0163i iei o biciclet\u0103!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ecoul prietenilor ducea gluma mai departe:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 B\u0103i, hai c\u0103 simt c\u0103 \u00ee\u0163i iei \u015fi tu o biciclet\u0103! Ha, ha, ha!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Unii refuzau s\u0103 mai r\u0103spund\u0103 c\u00e2nd Frumuz le rostea numele, sper\u00e2nd c\u0103 \u00ee\u015fi vor auzi \u015fi punctajul far\u0103 s\u0103 fie identifica\u0163i de mul\u0163imea r\u0103ut\u0103cioas\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dar Frumuz \u015ftia c\u0103 sunt acolo pentru c\u0103 promova\u0163ii la sal\u0103 urmau s\u0103 mearg\u0103 la poligon \u015fi pe traseu:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Popescu? Popescu? Unde este, dom\u2019le? A plecat? Trecem mai departe?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Sunt aici. Pute\u0163i s\u0103 \u00eemi spune\u0163i \u015fi mie rezultatul, v\u0103 rog?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 P\u0103i, de ce nu r\u0103spundea\u0163i, doamn\u0103?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Eeh, am zis c\u0103…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 N\u2011ave\u0163i un rezultat r\u0103u… 13 puncte.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 13 puncte \u00eenseamn\u0103 c\u0103 am picat, e un rezultat r\u0103u.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Putea s\u0103 fie \u015fi mai r\u0103u. Cu 13 puncte, dac\u0103 v\u0103 preg\u0103ti\u0163i un pic, sigur data viitoare ve\u0163i avea succes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Unii candida\u0163i \u015ftiau c\u0103 nu aveau nicio \u015fans\u0103 \u015fi r\u0103spundeau agresiv sau nep\u0103s\u0103tori. Frumuz avea un scenariu \u015fi pentru ei:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Bravo, domnule! 23 de puncte. Ah, v\u0103 rog s\u0103 m\u0103 ierta\u0163i, m\u2011am uitat pe alt formular, \u015fapte puncte. V\u0103 rog s\u0103 m\u0103 ierta\u0163i!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dac\u0103 erai arogant, Frumuz \u00ee\u0163i d\u0103dea o secund\u0103 de speran\u0163\u0103.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bine\u00een\u0163eles, erau \u015fi pu\u0163ini, foarte pu\u0163ini candida\u0163i care luau sala. Nu am auzit niciun rezultat maxim. Frumuz \u00eei striga, le spunea repede punctajul \u015fi trecea mai departe. Cu promova\u0163ii urma s\u0103 se distreze mai t\u00e2rziu la poligon sau pe traseu. Invidio\u015fii anonimi \u00eens\u0103 nu puteau s\u0103 treac\u0103 peste succesul altora a\u015fa u\u015for, mai ales c\u0103 marea majoritate a promova\u0163ilor erau doamne \u015fi domni\u015foare care trataser\u0103 examenul cu mai mult\u0103 seriozitate:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Ia uite, b\u0103i, numai tocilarele au trecut ast\u0103zi!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 P\u2011astea sigur le pic\u0103 la poligon!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2014 Asta a mai luat o dat\u0103 sala, dar probabil a picat traseul de mai multe ori \u015fi au pus\u2011o s\u0103 dea din nou sala!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Fragment din volumul de povestiri cu acela\u0219i titlu de Florin Du\u021bu<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":350,"featured_media":11287,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29],"tags":[2236,1764,2237,98],"coauthors":[2235],"class_list":["post-11286","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-fictiune","tag-chiorpangiu","tag-editura-polirom","tag-florin-dutu","tag-proza-scurta"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/Chiorpangiu_Debut_HC-a.jpg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11286","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/350"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=11286"}],"version-history":[{"count":7,"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11286\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":11297,"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/11286\/revisions\/11297"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/11287"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=11286"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=11286"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=11286"},{"taxonomy":"author","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/revistafamilia.ro\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcoauthors&post=11286"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}